A Promise to Live
by Admiral T. DeVanto
Summary: "Don't die on me Four-Eyes," he said. "Promise me that." Levi was holding on to what he had left, and he was not letting her slip through his fingers.


Levi could only watch with a blank stare at the still form in the dark laboratory. The scientists head was resting on the table, brown hair a disarray as she clutched a worn, leather book in her hand. Soft snores could be heard in the silent room. The darkness and loneliness seemed determined to swallow everything, including the fragile figure that slept.

He snorted. If he ever thought of Four-Eyes as fragile, he would need only to remember her strange fascination with Titans.

He strode into the room, his footsteps light and silent as he took in her sleeping figure before him. With the small candle light, he could just make out how pale and guat she really was. The very sight was a true wake-up call for him.

The past events that made her, that made all of them, like this came rushing back to him. Erwin's death was the freshest on his mind at the moment.

His heart lurched when he saw the single tear that was on her cheek, dried up, but still there.

"Oh Four-Eyes," he murmured softly, reaching out to shake her awake. But he stopped, his hand hovering over her shoulder as he remembered the reason for her sorrows.

The loss of Moblit, her squad, and Erwin.

All too soon. All in a single moment.

He could have saved Erwin. He could have saved their friend if only he had injected the Titan serum into him. But he chose to save Armin. He chose to save the young boy. Choosing between two different living beings always came with a price. For in saving one, you condemned another.

So he had condemned his friend. He had unknowingly made good on his promise, a promise he had made all those years ago when he had sworn to kill Erwin Smith.

It took a while, and a friendship had grown between him and Erwin. He willingly followed Erwin into battle, fought for and with him and so many others. But it was ironic that he made good on his promise in the end. It was his choice, his action, that had killed Erwin.

It had not gone unnoticed by him how Hanji had expected him to save Erwin. She had thought that in all this death, Erwin would come back. She had not expected Levi to deny their commander another chance at life.

He had told Erwin to accept his fate, to prepare for death and abandon his dreams for the cause of humanity. The look of relief on Erwin's face then in that moment had been unexpected. To think anyone would welcome death was a tragic twist in life. But this life was twisted anyway.

In denying Erwin the chance to live, Levi thought he had done the right thing in releasing him from this cruel world and preventing him from reliving this Hell.

But now, he was not so sure. After all, it had not been his life he had condemned in the first place.

His heart clenched once more. "I am sorry," he said softly.

Hanji continued to sleep, unaware of the conflicted human being standing by her.

He sighed, gently bending down and scooping Hanji up into his arms. She stirred a bit, still clutching her book before resting her head on his chest with a tired sigh.

Levi said nothing as he left the laboratory and carried her down the halls. He knew she would work herself to death to try and avoid the sorrow.

To him, it was just Hanji and himself. Everyone else was dead. Everyone he cared about was dead. The names of the dead all went way back to his childhood and continued on. It was almost too much for him to handle, so he blocked it all out.

And he would continue to do so.

"Don't die on my, Four-Eyes," he said softly as he silently walked into her dark room, still carrying her. "Promise me that. I can't lose another friend." He gently set her down in her bed, the cold sheets brushing against his knuckles as he pulled away. "Promise me," he said quietly.

"Only if you promise to live," Hanji said suddenly in the darkness.

He looked down at her and saw her eyes blink closed once more. "Only if you promise," she said tiredly, her words slurred as sleep tried to overtake her. "To live."

He leaned over to remove her glasses, setting them down. He pulled the covers over her, getting ready to leave.

"You're strangely gentle," she murmured.

He looked back at her. "I am learning to cherish what I still have."

"I've lost so much," she said. "I won't add you to the list."

He nodded. "Nothing will change. It's just you, and me. We'll get through this together." He watched as she fell asleep, peaceful at last. He stepped back turning his back on her sleeping form and reaching for the door. He glanced back with a tired look, the weight of all that had transpired finally coming down on him.

"Good night, Hanji Zoe," he said as he quietly closed the door.


End file.
